Still on bed rest...

I'm a bad news first/good news second person, so I'll get this out of the way first:

I'm still on bed rest. The doctors keep saying "stay on bed rest a few more days, and we'll check in at that point." A few days go by, I check in with them, and they say the same thing.

The medication seems to work in keeping my contractions around every 30-90 minutes, (which is down from about 9/hr on Tuesday, if we're going off the non-stress test rate-- the NST caught contractions I wasn't even aware I was having), but it hasn't stopped them completely. Luckily, the contractions aren't painful, even with my embarrassingly low pain tolerance. Some are more intense than others, some wrap all the way from my belly to around my back. The bad ones start with a hot flash before I feel the tightening and I find myself holding my breath until they pass-- but still, they aren't causing anything I would call pain. Thank God! 

I'm trying really hard to keep a good attitude about bed rest, but it hasn't been easy. Bed rest seems like fun when you aren't pregnant, but really, it's not. It's boring, isolating, and for me-- frustrating.  I'd rather be going to work, running errands, seeing friends, visiting family, doing things outside while it's summer, cooking, and getting the most I possibly can out of this time before becoming a mother. 

The worst part: There's no scientific evidence that bed rest is even effective at preventing pre-term labor. I'm still doing what the doctors and nurses say to do, but it's hard to be enthusiastic about doing something that is prescribed because "it can't hurt." I'd rather be putting my energy into something that's been proven effective, rather than putting my faith in "it can't hurt," and "well, that's just what we say to do in these situations."  If you're actually interested, here's what I've been reading on this: this article from the Chicago Tribune,  this from the New York Times, this from March of Dimes, this from the Mayo Clinic, and-- a little less hard-hitting, but this I've also read this from Parents Magazine, and this from BabyCenter. 

 

On to better things-- 

One upside from this has been the additional ultrasounds we've been doing last week and this week. They aren't quite as fun now because he's too big to get a good shot of any particular body part. And anyway, right now, they're more focused on checking to see if his kidneys are functioning and his blood flow is good than on getting good shots of adorable little noses and toes. (Happy for his kidneys to work and all, but I just don't get quite as excited about kidneys as I do looking at his face or his hands.) But we could see that so far, all X's organs are doing fine. The contractions have had zero effect on him-- he's still as active as ever with no change in heart rate. He's now flipped & in birthing position, and he's practice breathing now-- both of which earned him "lots of points" from the ultrasound tech. And not surprisingly, the tech also said his diaphragm is well developed. (He's gotten that comment on his diaphragm from every tech & doctor who's seen his ultrasound since he was 12 weeks along.)

And, bed rest isn't awful all the time. On nice days, I've tried to spend an hour or so laying down by our apartment complex pool. I'm on modified bed rest-- so I'm allowed to go on brief outings in town, to take the dog outside to do her business, etc. as long as I'm still spending 9 hours a day laying down. Getting outside helps with the cabin fever... and it makes me feel like I'm able to enjoy a little bit of our fleeting Seattle summer.

Quick update

Well, I'm still on bed rest through Monday or Tuesday.

I'm still having contractions, but they've slowed down to about 1-3 an hour.  The doctor is still concerned by the fact that I'm having contractions, but the fact that they're spread out more is a good sign. The lab tests ruled out an infection, so we still don't know why I'm having contractions. (But I'm happy to come off the antibiotics. Blech!)

So, I'll go in for an ultrasound Monday or Tuesday to make sure the contractions aren't starting labor. If the ultrasound shows no signs of labor, then I might come off of bed rest! Yippee!

Numbers and Bed rest

25: Number of contractions I had on Monday
90: percentage certainty I felt that the contractions were just dehydration
10: Time I started a non-stress test at my doctor's office on Tuesday
3: Number of contractions I had in 20 minutes
117: Lowest heart rate measured for X during my 1st non-stress test on Tuesday (some cause for concern, but now seems to be just a fluke)
140-160: X's heart rate 99.9% of the time, even during a contraction (which is excellent, and a reason to think X is handling contractions like a champ)
3: pounds X currently weighs
2.5: pounds most babies weight at that point... my son is a big boy. And bigger babies have better chances when born early.
1.5: weeks ahead that his head is measuring (in other words, he's got a big head. D'oh!)
12:40: Time I started talking to my doctor after several more tests
0: Amount I'm dilating (this is GREAT news--- it means I am very unlikely to deliver within a week of taking that measurement-- anything more would be, well, bad.)
29: Weeks gestation I'm currently at
32: Weeks gestation my doctor is "confident we'll get to"
37: Weeks gestation my doctor is "hopeful we'll get to" (this is considered full-term)

1: (pound) weight at birth required for some expectation of survival

90: percentage survival rate for babies born at 29 wks, but with significant long term complications

Extremely high: survival rate for babies born at 32 weeks

Extremely low: chance of long-term complications for babies born at 32 weeks.

0: Expectations I had for having that conversation with my doctor on Tuesday
1: (Hour) time I was given to go home, eat, and pack an overnight bag before I had to be checking in at the hospital
5.5: Hours spent in the hospital Tuesday
24: Hours I was supposed to spend in the hospital (yay for being discharged early!)
1: Shot of Turbutaline given to stop contractions
4: Rating I gave the contraction I experienced just before I got my shot of Turbutaline (most I've had are 1 or 1.5)
2: Number of contractions I had after I had the shot of Turbutaline, over the course of 5 hours
3: Number of tries the nurse made to get my IV in place (3rd time's the charm)
1.25: Liters of fluids I got while hooked to the IV. Fun.
5: Number of visitors I had at the hospital (lucky me!)
5: Days I was told to go on bed rest
2: Times a day I have to take a pill that is supposed to stop contractions
4: Times a day I have to take an antibiotic in case an infection is the culprit behind the contractions (Crossing fingers that's all it is behind this craziness-- never thought I'd say "I sure hope I have an infection" before.)
9: hours a day I'm supposed to spend in bed, light activity and 1 short outing a day permitted in between 3 hour blocks of time in bed.
3/3: Days Ken has been home with me while I've been on bed rest
22: Hours my mom spent with me while I was in the hospital/first morning at home
5: Meals my mom made or bought for us while she was here (thanks, Mom!)
0: Amount of money Virgin America Airlines charged me to cancel my flight to California when I told them I couldn't fly because I'd been put on bed rest
259: Amont of money they credited my account (the full price of the ticket I couldn't use)
1: New huge fan of Virgin America Airlines
18: Contractions I had Wednesday (1st day on bed rest)
19: Contractions I had on Thursday
5: Contractions I've had so far today
1: Contraction I'm currently experiencing
100: Percentage I'm ready to be done with this contraction/bed rest business
5: Meals Kenneth has brought me in bed or on the couch (Lunch yesterday: Black bean burgers with cheddar-- yum! Breakfast this morning: Waffles with cinnamon butter, veggie sausage, and eggs)
2: Times each day he brings me a new, cold, full water bottle
1: Fantastic husband taking over household -- everything-- while I'm on bed rest
1: Lucky wife (me)

Trying to look on the bright side of things:
1. Even if I'm on bed rest until I get to term, that's only 7 more weeks (and I know women who have been on bed rest for most of their pregnancies). We'll need a game plan, but even in worst case scenario 7 wks seems do-able
2. Worst case scenario-- if pre-term labor can't be stopped, we're far enough along that while there would be a long stay in the NICU and other unpleasant things, X has an excellent chance of surviving and thriving.
3.  X is incredibly healthy and handling this well. He's a big, healthy, active little guy and that's a really good thing for now.
4. I'm starting to figure out what the contraction triggers are: stress--even incredibly mild amounts, and any movement that uses stomach muscles-- like going from laying down to sitting up, sitting up to standing up, etc.
5. We find out today if it's just an infection, and if that's the case, this will all blow over as soon as the infection clears up. Then I'll be back to a normal, low-risk pregnancy. Cross your fingers that's the case!

Quick update, in list form

1. Our mom's families threw us baby showers. Yay! Between the showers and our friend Dana, who gave us some of her son's outgrown clothes (thanks, Dana & family!), X is now (we think) all set for clothing until he reaches about the 9 month size. (PS-- these were family only showers, so don't be offended if you weren't invited.) 

H family shower

A cupcake, with X on it!

And the E family shower. 

I forgot to bring my camera. Oops. But my cousin Patty and my mom both posted pictures on their blogs, so check them out here and here. This shower was a joint one for my sister and I (she's due 4 wks before me)... thrown by my cousin Michelle & my mom. 

This was actually more of a family reunion BBQ with a shower intermission. My sister Sara flew up for the shower, and we hung out pretty late with cousins after almost everyone else left. I actually had to leave at 11:00 pm to meet up with friends for late night coffee-- and felt really bad. (I expected the family BBQ/shower to be over by 10.)  But that's how awesome it was-- my cousins, their spouses, my parents, and my sisters are really fun to hang out with. 

I had to steal this picture from Mom's facebook. Contrary to what the evidence seems to show, I was actually 20 wks pregnant at the time. I just didn't stand at the right angle for it to be obvious. This picture is of me and the other pregnant ladies there-- my sister and Michelle.

2. Speaking of Michelle, she had her baby Wednesday-- on his due date! (She's now 2 for 2 with having babies on their due dates!) She's hilarious, and a faithful blogger. (Blogging the birth story from the hospital HOURS after he was born!) So check out her blog post on her baby's birth. You'll laugh. You'll cry. You'll try to nominate her for a Pulitzer (or whatever they give out for blog posts).

3. Kenneth climbed Mt. Rainier. Well, almost. He got sick a few thousand feet from the summit and had to turn back. Here are some pictures:

4. Baby updates...

• My hunch is that X is going to arrive on or before November 1. Somewhere in week 39 maybe. We'll see if I'm right, but that's what my gut keeps saying. (I've probably now jinxed it and X is going to come at 42 wks. Bah.)
• Apparently mothers who consumed a large quantity of nuts during their pregnancy (i.e. nuts or a nut product everyday) increase their child's risk of developing asthma by 50%. Guess what I have for breakfast everyday? Peanut butter on toast. At 7 months pregnant, the damage is probably already done, so I'm planning to continue eating peanut butter on toast. Sorry about the asthma, X! At least I haven't given you fetal alcohol syndrome or something worse!
• X has been kicking for a while now. Kenneth has felt them now, and he's even seen the kicks from the outside! So bizarre, and yet so cool!
• I don't have gestational diabetes! Hooray! But here's the thing about the test-- everyone warns you about how nasty the drink you have to have is. But no one told me about how hard it would be to fast for 12 hours while pregnant. Or having my blood drawn 3 times (I thought it was just twice.) That was no fun at all!
• We've been re-organizing our apt for the last 2 months. We're staying in our 700sq ft apt, so we're making space for baby things. Our apt now looks like it has been furnished by Ikea, but it gets the job done. We have a few things to take to Goodwill, and a few things to put in storage, but other than that, we're all set. Pictures of what it looks like to cram 2 adults, a big dog, and a baby in 700sq ft to follow.  I'm actually kind of proud of how it turned out-- we made it work!
• We now have all the ABSOLUTELY necessary baby things-- car seats, bassinet/crib, clothes, diapers, and food source (me). We need to get more diapers and more odds & ends, but if heaven forbid, X were to arrive tomorrow, the amt of scrambling we'd have to do is pretty minimal. We've even started packing our hospital bag! (Ok, full disclosure-- it has 2 pairs of loose, old sweat pants for me and 4 going home from the hospital outfits for X. But it's a start!)
• We're signed up for childbirth classes, a hospital tour, and a car seat safety class. Kenneth took a class called "Conscious Fathering" last night. On a related note-- Kenneth has been great during this pregnancy. He lets me whine when my back aches or when I was feeling nauseous, brought me breakfast in bed most days during my 1st trimester, and he's been there for every doctor visit I've asked him to go to. Pregnancy isn't easy, even with an amazing partner, so I have a new appreciation for the women who don't have the support of their partner during their pregnancies. 
• Nothing is official yet, but we think X's baptism will be Thanksgiving weekend so we can sneak it in just under the wire, before Advent starts. (A lot of Catholic churches won't do baptisms during Advent). But we still need to decide on X's godparents and whether he'll be baptized at the church where we got married, at Kenneth's family's church, or somewhere else entirely. 

5. We've got an exciting month ahead of us-- a trip to the beach! a trip to CA for my dad's 50th birthday! Kenneth turns 30! A visit from my stepsister! Great-great-aunt-Grace turns 99! Not the best picture of her, but she really does make 98/99 look good.

4th of July

Every year, Kenneth's mom's family gathers at his grandpa's beach house on the 4th of July. It's a big family, so there are people everywhere, and there's often a line for the bathroom. The house is pretty rustic-- it was never meant to be used so often or by so many people.  But the tradition of gathering as a family each 4th of July makes it a very special place all the same. 

24 week picture. X just keeps getting bigger.

Some of the family at our spot on the beach. (Later that day, when the tide was in, the fire was put out by  the waves. When it's high tide, it's really high tide.) 

Juniper spent lots of time playing with Henry, a chocolate lab puppy--the new addition to Kenneth's aunt & uncle's household. This was Henry's first time in the water, so Juniper was supposed to teach him how to play fetch. Unfortunately, he got distracted and wandered off down the beach with Kenneth's uncle running after him. 

Kenneth used his eagle scout skills to help save fire #2 after the 1st one was covered by water. Unfortunately, we had to head home before we got to enjoy the s'mores made by the fire. Or many of the fireworks. But it was still a great weekend and a great day with family. 

Sticking to my guns

The pictures have nothing to do with the post. But isn't Juniper funny?

I'm finally starting to get to the point that I'm obviously pregnant. You know how when you think someone might be pregnant, but you're not sure and don't want to be rude just in case they happen to just be putting on weight, so you don't say anything? I guess it's obvious enough that I'm pregnant, not possibly-maybe-could be just putting on some weight, because I've had 2 work acquaintances (volunteers) say this week after taking one look at me "Oh my gosh! You're pregnant!" After which, they start rubbing my belly (without asking-- yikes!-- not sure how to politely avoid the belly-touching. Family and friends who ask first = no problem. Strangers and acquaintances just grabbing my belly = weird). Anyway, next, inevitably comes the question my co-workers and those who volunteer or serve as Elders with the church ask next...

"So what's your plan? Are you coming back to work, or...?" 

I'm not sure if this is a pretty normal question to get as a pregnant woman-- even now, when most moms work outside the home in the US, or if I get it more often because the culture at work (co-workers and the congregation) is full of stay-at-home-moms and moms who work part-time. Chances are, if your husband works for Microsoft or any of the other tech companies in the area, you can get by just fine or better than fine with one income or 1 1/2 incomes-- and that's the case with a lot of people in the city I live/work in. So it's understandable that people ask. But either way, my impression is that a lot of people assume that I'll be quitting my job or cutting back on my hours. So, usually I find myself  answering by making justifications and lengthy explanations on our decision for me to continue working full-time after I return from maternity leave. 

And then I realized yesterday what I was doing. I'm trying to prevent these people from judging me and our parenting decisions by rationalizing, justifying, and explaining our decision. Kenneth-- he doesn't usually do this, but around almost everything that I know is seemingly controversial or bucks others' assumptions, I find myself doing justifying our choices.

But that's the thing. The fact is that whether our kid has a parent at home raising him full time, or whether we choose to send him to a daycare or hire a nanny, whether I have a midwife or an OB delivering me, or whether we choose any number of other "controversial" decisions as parents, it shouldn't matter to anyone. Our kid is going to grow up with 2 parents who are involved in his life, love him, provide for him, and prioritize raising him to be a considerate, responsible, productive member of society. If we fail in doing any of that-- then sure, someone should point that out, and we should listen and possibly change what we're doing. But those should be the only things that matter to anyone else-- if we're doing that, then we're doing our job as parents. 

 While I'm sure over the coming years, there are going to be lots of things that I resolve to do, not to do, or do better as a parent, here's what I'm going to start with. I'm going to stick to my guns. No rationalizations-- for anything-- necessary. Hopefully Kenneth will keep me accountable so I can break this habit, but it wouldn't hurt if you guys helped too. :)

(P.S. Pictures from shower #1 with the Ellises and other more fun stuff coming soon. But I have to grab photos from Ken's computer, etc.)

Popping + anatomy scan ultrasound

13 weeks

17 weeks (and this is after a HUGE breakfast) 

19 weeks

20 weeks

Oh, hello baby bump. You've officially arrived.

********************

We had our last official ultrasound on Friday, and Kenneth and Kenneth's mom were there for it. He showed us his boy parts--- it was very obvious; even if we hadn't wanted to know it couldn't have been helped-- he wanted to show off. The other fun part was seeing him suck his thumb. I teared up because it made things all that more real to see X doing something babies outside of the womb do ... Kenneth was asking if this was normal, and if it meant we were going to have to wean him off the thumb later.

The also checked him out to make sure all parts were there and in good working order-- and the good news is that everything looked great. They checked his brain, heart, lungs, spine, and then measured his head, brain, and chest circumference, and the length of his femurs-- and everything was perfect.  2 arms, 2 legs, 10 fingers, 10 toes. It was pretty amazing getting a sneak peek at him. Oh, and apparently he now weighs 10oz... based on my current size, I would've guessed he was closer to a pound by now, but apparently not. (Btw-- 10oz is exactly where a 19.5 wk baby should be.)

Anyway--- pictures. I think he has Kenneth's nose and my feet based off the pictures, but we'll see.

This one is squarely on his face. (Turn your head to the right to see it.)  Usually they only pick up bone and tissue, but they even picked up the lens of his eye on this one. And his mouth is open. The result is a Terminator looking baby. Yikes! 

FOOT! A teeny little 3.5 centimeter foot!