X's birth
Mom wrote up X's birth story and posted some pictures
here and mom puts it eloquently, but here are some (less eloquent) additions:
The day before X was born: I've heard the day before you go into labor, a lot of women have a burst of energy and nesting, and a few women are more fatigued. I walked the dog and went to Michael's to pick up supplies to make X's baptism candle. And I was totally exhausted after those 2 things, which was odd since those 2 things weren't usually that much for me. I thought maybe the extra exhaustion meant labor was close... but it could just mean I was a woman who was 39, almost 40 weeks pregnant. Big deal. Later that night though, we had dinner with some friends, and on the way home I told Kenneth that something has changed... I couldn't explain what exactly, but I knew something was up. I just felt
different.
39 wks
39.5 wks pregnant... I wanted to compare to this picture:
14? wks
ASHAMED TO ADMIT, BUT TRUE:
1. Before labor, my contractions were often regular, but never closer than 8 minutes apart, and they usually didn't come closer and closer together. So when my contractions went from 6 minutes apart to 4 minutes apart to 3 minutes apart from 6am-9am, and it became clear I was actually going into labor in the morning on my due date, one of my first thoughts was "HA! Michelle isn't the only Ellis woman who has babies on their due dates." With a 6am start to labor, I thought I'd have the baby by the end of the day. ---> This came back to haunt me when I was still in labor 24 hours later. D'oh!
2. At one point while I was in early labor (that is, when I was in pain, but still able to go for a walk with Kenneth and not put ALL of my concentration into getting through contractions) I actually said to Kenneth "Wow, if this is as bad as it gets in early labor, I don't understand the women who demand an epidural as soon as they arrive at the hospital. They must have really low pain thresholds." <---- Hahaha. Words that would come back to haunt me. When the hospital sent me home the 2nd time at 9pm, the nurse mentioned something about maybe sending me home with morphine so I would be able to sleep while I progressed more at home before I could be admitted. So when we came back to the hospital the 3rd time at 3am, and said I was almost at 4cm, my reaction was this: "OH! THANK GOD! Can I please have morphine now?" (It took at least 2 more hours before I got the epidural.)
what would've been 41 weeks
Things people told me about labor:
TRUE: "Any concept of modesty you once had goes out the window while you're in labor/after you have a baby." So true. After enough strangers see and poke around your nether regions, you stop caring. At least for that day.
FALSE: "The contractions only last for a minute or 2 at most, and there are 2 or 3 minutes between them so you have breaks. UNLESS you have pitocin or other drugs to intensify or start contractions." This I heard a lot from the natural childbirth fans. And this is false. False, false, false. I had 5-6 minute long contractions with just a few seconds between them during the hours that I pushed. Granted they had nice gradual build ups, but we were all sitting around waiting for the darn contraction to peak so I could push. After a while I felt like that wasn't doing any good and just pushed when I was close-ish to the peak, and then I just pushed 4 or 5 times until I felt I needed a break.
FALSE: "An epidural will slow your labor" and "If you have an epidural, you won't be able to EXPERIENCE birth." Ok, the first might be true-- I was at 6cm when I got the epidural. But I kept progressing right along, no problem. From hospital check-in to hitting 10cm was less than 7 hours. The epidural had no bad side effects as far as I can tell. And it made the c-section go quicker. As for it interfering with the experience, since I was actually able to pay attention to what was going on around me after the epidural, I'd say it helped me experience labor more-- I actually remember more from my time in the hospital once I got the epidural-- and I remember NOTHING from the time we got to my labor room to the time I got to the epidural.
Other things about the epidural:
- We got the bill from the anesthesiologist yesterday--- crazy expensive (before insurance kicks in), and worth every stinkin' penny.
- Mentally, I think of my labor process as pre-epidural/horrible, post-epidural/feeling happy, and OH NO! Epidural wearing off!!!! The epidural is basically how I remember what happened when during my labor. That is, there was the time where I was in pain, the time I wasn't in pain, and the time when the pain came back.
FALSE: "If you have a c-section, your milk won't come in and you won't have the initial rush of hormones to help you bond with the baby." False and false. I was on such a high after X was born. It lasted for days-- and I can now tell the difference between the post-birth hormonal high that bonded me to my son, and the bond I have with him now. And I'm feeding him just fine too.
He came out blue, but screaming-- and that was a beautiful sound.
Kenneth held X first, and then brought him to me so I could meet our little guy.
And also,
WEIRD: Introductions in the OR room. Once X's heart rate sunk to 80, and wouldn't come back up, the doctor gave us the option of a c-section or a vacuum assisted birth-- but either way the baby had to come out
fast, and my previous 3 hours of pushing made it clear I wasn't going to get him out fast enough on my own. Kenneth and I talked over the risks of each with the doctor, and then Kenneth and I talked things over, and opted for the c-section. (More risks to me, less for the baby. Baby wins, obviously.) I don't think either of us have ever been so scared-- I was about to have surgery because our baby's life was in danger. So when we got to the OR room, and everyone started introducing themselves, it was bizarre on a few levels:
1. The only one in the room not wearing a mask was the one on the table. We won't be able to recognize you outside of this OR room, so why are you bothering to introduce yourself?
2. I already knew the midwife that assisted-- so why was she introducing herself again?
3. Most importantly-- HELLO! The baby is in trouble. Why are you wasting time with introductions and why haven't you started cutting me open yet? Between getting me to the OR room and getting the baby out, it took only about 10-15 minutes, but that still felt like a long, long time when you're worried about the safety of your kid.
Other weird things about the c-section:
1. Hearing the med student say "Can I do the staples?" (What? Why is the med student doing anything at all?)
2. Hearing "Almost done", looking up into the lights (which reflected what the OB and midwife were doing) and seeing they were not putting my skin together as expected, but were actually still working a little deeper... Ew.
(6 days later he was 20 inches, so the nurse measuring him said he was probably measured incorrectly at birth, so I've been going with 20 inches as his birth length)
